I enjoy being alone sometimes. People either annoy me, intimidate me, or give me anxiety. There is so much pressure to entertain and have things in common. When I have a meaningless conversations with the same people frequently, is that what makes friends? If the only thing we have in common is drinking, can that make you friends? I'm not a very exciting person and I'm fine with that. However, I feel like no one wants to hang around those who are not exciting. The funny part is that most of the people I know end up usually going to bars. Is that really considered doing something? What makes spending 6 dollars on a beer sitting around talking any better than spending .50 per beer doing the same thing in the comfort of someone's home. Maybe it's the long lines leading to the bathroom, or trying to talk over 20 other conversations going on. I'll go to a bar, I'll do things, but it's not something that I care too much about if I don't do that.
Here's something even better, I barely like the company of my own friends. I think they're all great, but I know they're sitting their gossiping in their own minds that I'm a pussy who spends too much time with his girlfriend. So what if I do? I hate machoism. Show me a guy who doesn't pump out his chest and talk about the awesome things he does and I'll show interest. Personally, people are boring. If I'm not with my girlfriend or my family, I'm alone. I'm still not sure if I'm okay with that because society tells me I'm a loser for not really having friends. I'm just done with the party scene. I've gotten high, wasted, thrown up, blacked out, broken things, but the biggest reason I did go out was to find a girl to hook up with. I'm sure most guys would agree with this, but I also was looking for someone to continue conversations and get close to. Is it really so bad that I don't desire the need for friends?
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